The other day I was at therapy with Ethan and I met a new mom of a 10 week old baby. She was still having a hard time with her son's diagnosis. I felt so bad for her. I remember being there too. The only difference is I found out during my pregnancy and she found out after. I have heard some people say that they are glad they didn't find out. For me I am really glad I knew. While at first it was hard, it did give me a chance to learn about Down syndrome before he got here. I also had my chance to grieve. I remember so clearly in my mind the day I got my amnio results. I really felt like I had just lost a close member of my family. I remember not being able to even drive to work because all I could do was cry. I can't imagine what people thought of me. Some family members thought I was worring for nothing. They didn't understand the pain I was feeling though. I tried my best to put on a happy face, but deep down I was a wreck. People told me "not to worry because as soon as I saw my son I would fall in love with him." I don't care how many times I heard it I just could not believe it. Now here it is 9 months later and I can't believe how much I DO love my son. I couldn't imagine my life without him. I feel so bad for that new mom and hope that she can get to the place I am at soon. As a matter of fact, one of my friends, who also has a daughter with Down syndrome told me at our support group meeting that she thinks I am going to be the president of our support group one day! I had to laugh at that. Watch out Lucy, here I come! My little man is still not sitting up yet. It is funny though, just as I am focusing on one thing he does something completly different to shift my attention. He is waving hi and bye now. I have to admit, he might be behind in his gross moter skills but he sure does not seem to be lacking in his social skills. Here is a little video of him waving!
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